||[May. 21st, 2004|12:53 am]
Harry Potter's Grandma
I KNOW for a fact that she exists. One day I was wandering the streets of Hogsmeade when I saw an old lady that was using her wand to make her bags float for her. I only saw helping her as the right thing to do so i walked over and asked, "Would you mind if I helped with these bags?" And of course she smiled a big grandma-like smile and said,"Of course" So i pulled out my wand and took as much of the load as possible. When we got to her house I was invited in for her special "tea" and some stories. Most of the time I wouldn't wanna listen to some old lady tell stories but in this case I was intrigued and wished to stay.
For about 3 hours she told stories of when she was a youngun like i still am. Dragons and Pixies and Fairies and Goblins and all sorts of magical creatures that fill the muggle story books.
She told about the Dragon that attacked the school during a Quidditch game and wouldn't leave until he happened to eat the snitch and buggered off.
About the Pixies who swarmed the school in her 4th year and turned all of Hogwarts inside-out outside-in upside-down and downside-up. I was certainly surprised to find out that even that didn't stop the upside down indoors game of Quidditch.
Amazingly the Faeries didn't ruin the school at all! In fact, they cleaned up all the dank corners of the school and made it reflect so brightly that night time was still as lit up as the day.
The Goblins, of course, couldn't get by the greatest groundskeeper of the time, Gagrid, son of Fagrid, grandson of Eagrid, and soon to be father of Hagrid. He saw them comin' so he hid until they had ran past him, and he jumped out! He blocked their passage for escape and scared them outright. All they did was turn and stare wide eyed. He just said,"Are you lookin' at me?" And that was all the goblins heard before they had been set ablaze by the skillfull wand-handling of the great Gagrid.
What she hadn't told me yet was that she was mother to the brave and dashing James Potter. As soon as I heard I was shocked and confuzzled. It was her. It was Grandma Potter.
Being the confuzzled boy I suddenly was, I freaked out because I didn't know what to do or say or even think. So I hugged her. I hugged Grandma Potter.
Little did I know that she had drugged my "tea" and made me pass out soon after I hugged her. She then proceeded to remove all my clothes and force a potion down my throat that changed my appearance into that of James Potter. Then she put some of his old clothes on me and placed me in various lewd poses. When I came to and found out, we had a good laugh before I told her I had to leave to study for my OWL's. With a wave of her wand and a bright fireworky explosion, Grandma Potter said goodbye to me as I flew away on my custom built broom.
(coulda been better, i felt rushed)